Resolution Recap - May: Shopping Rules & Breaking Rules

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

I got new tennis shoes...


Chris bought them for me for my MBA graduation...


I didn't break the rules!

May, May, May..

May may (I know, I am wearing out that word) have been my easiest month yet. Being that I lost my job on April 30th, my attire has consisted of PJs, yoga pants, tee shirts, and yah, PJs. 

I don't really leave the house because sitting my butt on the couch is better. Or I work on DIY projects, walk the dogs, run errands, etc.

You would think with all this "free" time I would just want to go shop, shop, shop...and you're completely right!! Who am I kidding?! Of course I would love to spend countless hours at the mall, par-oozing the isles, but let's be real here.

Until last Thursday when I got a job we only had one for-sure income. I am still getting a severance until June 30th, but before we knew if I would find a job or not, we were being cautious with our spending.

Many people have asked me "How do you do it?!" or "How do I stop being a compulsive shopper?"

Let me start buy saying I love to shop. Nothing beats a new pair of shoes, right? But think about it. WHY are you buying those items? Do you NEED them? Do you WANT them? Could you spend your money more wisely? Are you trying to impress someone? Feel better about your appearance? Mask a deeper issue? Could you remix what you already have?

There are a million questions you could ask yourself before you buy something. And that is exactly what it is, just something. A materialistic something. 

My rule of thumb is: if you find something you like, walk around the store with it for at least 20 minutes. After that 20 minutes, reevaluate and ask yourself if you are still in love with it. Nine times out of ten you won't be that in love with the item anymore. 

Another tip: organize your closet. I wrote {here} about how I organized my closet. Having an organized closet allows you to see ALL the items of clothing you have. There have been multiple times I have thought I didn't have a certain piece of clothing, so I went out and bought it only to realize if I would have been organized, I could have found it. 

Lastly: think BIG picture. Disregard this message if you are swimming in cash and money is no factor, but I don't feel that is the situation for most of us. What do you want for your financial future? Last year I am sure I spent well over $2,000 on clothes, shoes, accessories. That could have been a vacation, a memory, money in savings, etc. I will say that (thank God) we have no credit card debt because it is easy to sign up for credit card after credit card to get that instant 20% discount. Don't do it! 

A huge realization for me was that going shopping, no matter for what, wasn't cheap. When I go to the mall, I usually eat, then get Starbucks or ice cream, then stop by Bath and Body Works and spend $75 on candles and lotion, oh wait, then I see a shirt Chris might like and buy him that, and now I am hungry again so I need a cookie, and my Mom would really love that bath salt someone just sold me, and on and on and on and on. Very rarely was I in and out with the only thing I went for. What I am saying is the atmosphere of a mall or shopping center is to get you to spendspendspend. That is why now I avoid it all together. Most of my shopping (for gifts) is done online so I don't have to endure the temptation.

All of what I have said is my own opinion, so take it as you will, but I just have one more item to hit on for those of you who have told me you are really struggling with cutting back on your shopping.

The biggest lure for bloggers is other bloggers. "Oh, so-and-so wore this dress and she has 5,879 followers, so maybe if I spend the outrageous $350 for that dress, I will have that many followers too!" Wrong. Guess what? No one even notices a) that whatever you are wearing costs $250 dollars, and b) that a blogger once wore it. Most bloggers that big get things given to them anyways, and I guarantee they didn't get there by wearing name brand clothes. And if they did, great for them! But that doesn't mean it happens to everyone. 

You have to realize that many, many bloggers get paid by selling you things. "You NEED this (fill in the blank)!!" and "You have to have one of (fill in the blank) in you closet. It is a must!" and physiologically we think, "maybe I really do need this? and since she is a popular blogger, if I buy it then I will be popular!" When in reality they are getting money in their pocket for you buying what they promoted...all while you are thinking you will suddenly hit the follower jackpot and gained one more follower. 

I don't mean to sound like Debbie Downer, but my resolution has really opened my eyes as to how I want to live my life and how I want to be portrayed. I don't want to be the girl who has to have new clothes to feel pretty, or the girl who has to have to most expensive wardrobe just to brag about it. That isn't me. If I was rolling in the dough, then maybe I would have some Louboutins chillin' in my closet and Lillie P. dresses lining my closet walls, but I would still make sure I never lost my identity in my clothes. 

I don't want to leave this Earth as the "girl who was really fashionable." Ouch, that would sting a lot. So the only impact I made on people was that I am stylish and have a big closet full of stuff? Bum-mer. I want to leave the world known as a woman with a big heart, a heart for God, who loved her husband and family more than anything. I want to be an impact on people and be talked about as an inspiration. Inspiring people through your words and actions is what is talked about for centuries. Inspiring people to buy more clothes and become more trendy won't leave a mark in will just go out of style just like perm I had in fifth grade. Gone with time, never to be brought back. 

I just want to leave you with this verse that I wrote along with my initial resolution announcement.

"Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Matthew 6:19-21


  1. Closet and drawer organization is key! I once bought a shirt, and then realized a week later that I already had the SAME shirt in my drawer that I had bought a few weeks before. Embarrassing, but true!

  2. I love going through my closet and riding of things I'm not wearing. I love this resolution you are doing, I know I've said it before but you are such an inspiration! That being said...what size in skirts are you?

  3. I an extent. I am very proud of you for sticking to your are have been an inspiration...but I don't buy clothes to be a big blogger or to gain followers or to make money. I have always loved to shop, fashion in general, style clothes and it's kinda of my shallow as that sounds. It's fun for me and I have been doing long before I started my blog. Yes, it is probably wasteful, but it's something that I am passionate about and enjoy sharing with others. :) Love you!!

  4. I've actually started selling the 'good' stuff I'm getting rid of on eBay - so far I've made a few hundred $$ - it's a bit of work to create the postings and ship the stuff - but it is cash in your pocket!!

  5. So agree with this. It has hit me recently!

  6. LOVE all of this! Saving money or spending it more wisely isn't always easy BUT, the reward for it after... is oh so sweet! & So much better than a 10 pieces of new clothes. (I say 10 because I'm cheap & & only buy things that are cheap or are on sale! HA!) & it's funny what a little strain on your budget will do. When Matt lost his job in Jan., I went into panic mode but, it made us stop & really think about what & where we were spending our money.

  7. It's so cool you've stuck with it so long!!! And congrats on the new job!!!

  8. I love that walk around the store idea. I try to do this, especially with more expensive items and almost ALWAYS find myself putting it back where it belongs instead of checking out with it. Yay for finding ways to save money but extra yay that you have a job so that worry is no longer hovering over you!

  9. Hi! Stopping by from Total Basset Case and I am SO IMPRESSED with this resolution. Seriously, I think I may have to actually try it. I always say "I'm going to start being better about spending" and to an extent, I am, but this has fueled me! Thank you!